A Sneak Peak
An overview of the Stop Your Drama Methodology
- The Premises
- The Language
- The Concepts
- The Principles
- The Endorsements
No Complaints | No Excuses | No Regrets
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What is Drama?
In the book, drama is defined as any obstacle to your peace or prosperity. Lots of things can become obstacles to your peace–even the voice in your head that makes you doubt yourself, or the fight you had with your spouse, or the anxiety you feel about not having enough time.
How Drama Manifests
Drama in the workplace is often experienced as relationship problems between boss and employee, between employee and employee, or between staff and consumer. Drama in the workplace hampers productivity and manifests as absenteeism, turnover, apathy, poor customer service and low morale.
I have developed a “language” to use in my coaching and teaching. The reasons are:
- It is easier to learn concepts using visuals.
- It is easier to separate emotion when using analogies.
- The common language offers a new way to communicate and problem solve by accessing the right side of the brain, where new insights are readily available.
The analogy used to speak about goal achievement is the rowboat going to an island. Whether you are rowing by yourself, or with a spouse or a team member, this is a visual that sticks in the mind of the learner. For example, getting lost in the fog symbolizes confusion; having your boat spring a leak symbolizes an energy drain; and so on.
- Getting stuck on the rock
- Rowing with one oar and no map
- The shark
- The yacht
- Other (?) Create your own!
The 8 Steps of Empowerment
1. Clear the Fog
Premise: The only reason we don’t get what we really want is because we are unclear.
The one with the clarity navigates the ship; everyone else shovels coal.
Many things fog our vision, for example, distractions, the need for other people’s approval, conflicting needs and hidden agendas. Once the vision is clear, progress can be made.
Clarity can change any situation.
Concepts: Clarity, commitment, leadership, and decision-making.
2. Identify the Gap
Premise: There are only two reference points important to reaching your goal: where you are, and where you want to go. The distance in between is called the gap. The bigger the gap, the more potential for drama and the more potential for getting burned out.
There is a distinction between “The drama” and “Your drama.” What happens in the gap is “The Drama.” Your reaction and ability to deal with what happens is “Your Drama.”
Life is lived in the gap and not on “the island.” Once a goal is reached, the desire for growth and a new vision will entice one to expand; therefore life is always lived in the gap. “Drama in the gap does not equal peace on the island.”
Concepts: Research; Self-examination; Tools such as business planning and SWOT analysis;
3. Tell Yourself the Truth
Premise: Most of what we believe to be true is an assumption, a judgment or a story. There is a kernel of truth in every story but the story is what keeps us from living and fulfilling our potential. Denial is the primary way people hide from the truth because of the story we have been led to believe that “the truth hurts.” Stories are not based on the present moment but are based on past conditioned response or a projected fear in the future.
Concepts: Self-awareness; Discernment; knowing how to separate fact from fiction.
4. Reinvent, Realign and Rejuvenate
Premise: The relationship with yourself is the primary relationship; when you are not happy with yourself, everything else suffers. The primary reason for drama is who you think you are. When you see yourself differently, your results change. Your self-image influences all of your relationships and even the way you conduct business, for example, sales, customer service and your ability to work as a team member.
Concepts: Trust; Self-respect versus self-betrayal; Self-esteem; Relationship with self; Spiritual connection.
5. Stop Relationship Drama
Premise: Everything is relational. There is the relationship you have with the situation, the relationship you have with yourself, and the relationship you have with others. The secondary reason for drama is who you think someone else is. When you first get clear on who you are, and when you are willing to see someone else differently, you open the field of possibilities for different results. Even if the relationship has to end, there will be no residual drama.
Concepts: Collaboration; Teamwork; Empowerment; Leadership; Boundaries.
6. Master Your Energy
Premise: It is no longer possible to manage time but you can maximize time by learning how to master your energy. Since everything in the universe is energy, productivity and well being is directly related to mastering energy. This is done by creating boundaries, getting your needs met and developing systems to help you maximize time.
Much illness is due to not understanding energy mastery. Working harder with less is contributing to more workplace drama and story-telling.
Concepts: Rejuvenation; Self-Care; Systems; Leverage.
7. Release Resistance
Premise: Regarding DRAMA…the solution is secondary. The solution comes only after you release resistance. Resistance can be identified by four main energy patterns which when broken allow one who is resisting to take full responsibility for making change.
Concepts: Awareness; Forgiveness; Acceptance; Empowerment; Choice; Consciousness; Responsibility.
8. Become a Creator
Premise: The path to empowerment is to become a creator. Creators take responsibility. Creators learn how to ask a different question. They see the opportunity. They don’t blame the economy, another person, or a situation. Creators live life in the flow and from the field of possibilities.
Concepts: Possibility; creativity; empowerment; collaboration; integrity.